One Day While Going Up The Stair

When he opened his eyes an hour later, it was to see a lovely, anxious face bending over him. A young woman, no doubt one of the Antari ambassador's party, was for some reason in his room. Spock stared, unmindful for several seconds that he did so. He had never seen alien features so aesthetically pleasing before. Her eyes, a most interesting shade of deep purple, looked into his with concern and compassion and deep knowledge. He blinked.

She smiled slightly with what he thought was an expression of relief and asked in Anglo-Terran, "How are you feeling?"

He swallowed several times before answering in the same language. "I am quite well." Her hands touched his shoulders and he bolted out of the bed, then stood looking uncertainly around a room entirely different than his own. Several people besides the Antari were in the room with him; two men, and one other woman, all Human, all, including the Antari, in Starfleet uniforms. The room itself was large, containing several beds, each equipped with an array of diagnostic apparatus. He could feel and hear the sound of engines and life support equipment. There was also background noise of voices exchanging information over intercoms. The temperature was uncomfortably cool. All this led him to conclude that he was still on board the ship. "I have been ill," he concluded. "Excuse me, I do not recall the circumstances that brought me to this ship's infirmary."

"A transporter accident," the younger of the Human males answered. He wore a gold tunic which Spock knew denoted command, while the other three wore blue, which symbolized sciences. The commander was young, although Spock was not sure how to ascertain Human ages. The man was younger than his mother, of that much Spock was certain. He had light brown hair, smooth features, and was of average height and build for a Human male; not stout but he perhaps would be inclined toward stoutness without the discipline of Starfleet.

"I do not recall any transporter accident," Spock told him. "However I do not doubt your word, sir. As I am obviously recovered, have I permission to return to my duties?"

"Are you sure you're feeling all right?" the Antari asked him.

"I detect that you are worried about my condition, lady," he answered, doing his best to reassure her. "You need not be. I am recovered from whatever injury I have suffered."

"I'm not so sure," the other woman said. Her features, vaguely familiar, resembled those of Vulcans. She was small, black-haired, her appearance aristocratic; of Ter-Asian ancestry yet her voice held a colonial accent. He raised an enquiring eyebrow at her. "Please lay back down," she requested in Vulcan, the words phrased as a polite command. Since she had knowledge and respect of his culture and his personal dignity, he complied without discussion.

"I am going to ask you some questions," she said, again in Anglo-Terran while keeping her eyes on the diagnostic panel. "They may sound illogical, but please answer them to the best of your ability. This is very important."

"You are a physician?" Spock asked her.

She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Spock perceived that this was an emotional reaction but was at a loss as to how to interpret it. "I am a xenopsychologist," she told him.

"Jade?" the Antari asked, stepping closer to the bed than Spock found comfortable.

"Ruth, Captain," the doctor said patiently, "I think you should leave Dr. McCoy and me with our patient."

Jade? Spock thought. The name, too, was familiar, and he glanced more closely at the woman. "Your full name, Doctor, if you please?"

"You don't remember any of us do you?" the male he assumed was Dr. McCoy asked.

"Have I reason to? Your name please, Doctor."

"Jade Melissa Han."

"Melissa?" the commander asked.

"Not now, James," she said patiently.

Spock blinked. "We know each other,” he said. Dr. Han smiled, nodding. Perhaps this transporter accident had caused some sort of brain damage, or hallucinations, for the Jade Han he knew was two years his junior. If such damage were incurable... No, I will not think of that now. He cleared his throat. “Your questions, Doctor?"

"Your answer to Dr. McCoy’s question is a good beginning. You do not remember us?"

"You are being redundant, Doctor, but I see no reason I should be."

"I see." She turned to the others that lingered around the bed.

"James, Ruth, please."

"But...." the Antari began.

"He's going to be fine, Ruthie," McCoy said. "You run along now."

"I'll wait in your office, Bones," she said with a firmness reminiscent of his mother.

"I'll be on the Bridge," the other man said.

"You are the captain of this vessel?" Spock asked.

"Yes, Spock."

"And the ship's name?"

"The U.S.S. Enterprise."

"I remember a Captain Swenson, a very tall, gray-haired Human. And the ship I was on was called the U.S.S. Farragut."

"Oy vey," the Antari said.

"Later Ruth, please," Dr. Han said.

"He's got amnesia," the Antari answered her.

"Very likely. Will you please let me run some tests."

The Antari sighed, then to Spock's surprise and discomfort, touched her fingers to his, almost a caress, before turning and quickly leaving the room. Antari custom, he thought but was given no time to ask.

"You were assigned to the Farragut?” This from McCoy.

"Assigned? No, I was aboard as a passenger."

"In what capacity?" Han asked.

"Diplomatic aide to Ambassador Sarek.”

"Oy vey," McCoy repeated the Antari’s words.

"Leonard," Dr. Han said to Dr. McCoy then addressed Spock again. "Your age please."

"Sixteen standard years," Spock answered.

"I see," Dr. Han said. She did several things with equipment that Spock was unfamiliar with, consulted in whispers with Dr. McCoy and, many minutes later, addressed Spock again. "You may sit up now." He did and she continued, "I believe you recognize my name. I am, in fact, the Jade Han you remember. However, I am thirty-eight years old." She handed him a small, mirror and indicated that he should look at himself. "You are forty years old."

He stared at the reflected image and did not recognize the face. Yet it had to be his own, did it not? Could twenty-five years have passed since he began an hour’s meditation? The stranger's face was essentially his own. Logic told him it must be true, therefore he must accept it. He could not afford the confusion of an emotional reaction. The face was still thin, yet grown somehow fuller without changing its essential characteristics. The nose resembled Sarek’s more than ever. He almost sighed at the realization before reminding himself it was an hereditary trait, an integral part of his Vulcan heritage.

He set the mirror down beside him on the bed. "I accept that I have amnesia," he told the doctors.

McCoy sighed. "Thank god you're going to be reasonable."

"I am being logical, Doctor," Spock informed him. "Although I believe the words have a similar meaning in Anglo-Terran."

"I was wrong," McCoy muttered, “he’s not being reasonable, he's being himself.”

Spock did not understand the man's apparent hostility. "You appear to be an overly emotional man, Dr. McCoy," he ventured, "even for a Human."

McCoy began a comment but was interrupted by Jade -- this was indeed the friend of his childhood. "I'm afraid none of our standard treatments for your condition are applicable to telepathic species."

"Most inconvenient."

"Yes. Quite. However we are fortunate in having an Antari keheil on board."

"I have, of course, read about empathic healers from Beta Antares Four,” he replied, “although I have seen no data pertaining to the success of their methods."

"Don't worry, it works," McCoy informed him.

"I was not expressing doubt, Doctor, merely my knowledge of -- "

Jade cleared her throat. Spock returned his attention to her. "You will permit Keheil ani Ramy to heal you?"

Spock considered. It would mean allowing an alien, female presence into his mind, which was not entirely appropriate. Still, she was a healer, and it was the only logical course of action — but it is not proper.

Twenty-four years have passed, Spock, he reminded himself. Will you disgrace your fathers by behaving as a youth when you are a man?

Will not such an action by the Antari create a link?

It must be something she does all the time. This hesitation is illogical; particularly when there seems to be little other alternative.

"Very well, Dr. Han,” he said aloud. “I will permit a meld."

She smiled, nodding again. "Good." She left the room, not returning for many minutes. Spock used the time to question the other, over-emotional doctor who seemed to take an odd satisfaction in answering him. "We are acquainted, Dr. McCoy?"

"For quite a while now."

"Indeed? In what capacity?"

"In what -- oh, as First Officer and Chief Medical Officer of the Enterprise.”

“I am in fact a Starfleet officer?"

"Your rank's commander.” The Human replied. “You're also the Chief of Science."

Spock considered this. "Most logical," he said.

"I knew you'd say that."

"Precisely how was I injured?" Spock asked, ignoring the self-satisfied grin on the doctor’s face.

"Beamed up and almost missed.” Spock felt a frown begin to come over his features and stopped the expression. His control was apparently affected by the accident, for a sour look came over the Human’s face. “Don’t look so prissy. What I meant was there was an ion fluctuation just as you were beaming up from a landing party. Scotty managed to save you, but not without scrambling a few synapses. It's not serious; even without Ruthie's help you'll recover given time. "

"Precisely how much time?"

"Could be hours, or days, or months. With telepathic species, nothing is ever certain.” Spock again caught himself beginning to frown and again stopped the expression before it reached his face. He considered the implications of the difference between a few hours and a few months and decided to cooperate thoroughly with the Antari method of healing.

Dr. Han eventually returned with the Antari. The keheil approached him silently, her face frowning in concentration. She stood in front of him, gazing at him without touching him. Spock felt a mental touch: impersonal, completely proper. He felt a sense of relief mixed with disappointment, followed by shame and an unexpected refusal to allow her to do more than touch the surface of his mind. He didn't want even that much, but was powerless to prevent it. She felt his distaste and retreated.

"Spock?" she asked aloud.

He blinked, reined in the unexpected emotions and answered, "Your pardon, lady, I am unaccustomed to mind melds." Dr. McCoy made an unpleasant sound that he suspected was a form of laughter.

Dr. Han asked, "What happened?"

"Just what I warned you might," Keheil ani Ramy answered. She turned to Spock and her smile would have charmed and cajoled anyone less than a Vulcan. "Since you understand the difficulty, perhaps you'll allow me to try again.”

"You may try."

Before he finished speaking he heard the Antari's voice in his mind. If you prefer I won't be so impersonal this time.

You are here to perform a duty, not carry on a conversation.

She exerted calm and he found himself responding with impatience. There are doors you must open for me, or at least unlock. I cannot, will not, break them down, she told him.

Are we speaking of a mind or a building?

I require your aid, Spock Sareklrn.

I will not stop you from healing.

If I am to heal, you must permit me a deeper knowledge of you.

Is it necessary for you to heal?

Yes.

I cannot.

What do you fear?

An interesting tactic.

Are we speaking of a chess game or a healing?

Then heal.

"Jade!" the Antari shouted.

"You're the keheil," the doctor replied with a lift of one eyebrow that Spock recognized though, at the moment, he couldn't recall from where.

"He won't let me in. I told you he was too neurotic at sixteen."

"But you're his — " McCoy began.

"Yeah, but he doesn't know that, Bones, and he couldn't handle it. Jade's right about that."

"Thank you, Lieutenant Valley," Jade said in a tone meant to put an end to any further discussion. It was a tone his father often used.

"Did you by chance study on Vulcan, Dr. Han?" he asked.

Her look held obvious annoyance that he did not understand. This passed quickly as she resumed a proper, calm attitude. He nodded his approval of her attempts to control her emotions. She had grown into a very wise Human. "Yes, Spock, I did. I thought you were going to cooperate."

"I am cooperating, Doctor."

"Not that I could see," the Antari said, more to herself, he thought, than to anyone else.

"Ruth," Jade cautioned.

Spock considered the various appellations used for the Antari: Lieutenant Valley, Ruth, Ruthie, keheil… Speculation rose within him. "Excuse me, Keheil," he asked, "may I ask your full name?"

"Lieutenant Ruth Maxwell Valley ani Ramy. And yes, I’m a hybrid, like yourself."

Spock covered his embarrassment at having allowed the reason for his question to be so transparent. "A Fleet officer? Most interesting."

"Personally, Jade, I think it would be good for him," McCoy said suddenly. The women looked at him sternly. He gestured with his shoulders, and said, "All right, he's your patient. I've got work to do."

After he left, Lieutenant Valley spoke to Dr. Han. "Why don't you prepare contingency plan A while I try one more time."

Dr. Han looked at Lieutenant Valley critically for a long time before turning the same long look on Spock. Eventually she nodded. "All right, but don't take Leonard's advice."

"Don't worry, I won't."

Once Dr. Han had left, Lieutenant Valley sat down next to him. She was closer to him than he felt necessary, but he was careful not to appear uncomfortable.

"What form of address would be the most proper?" he asked her. For some reason he found himself concentrating on studying her ear as he spoke. Too small, he thought irrelevantly. The roundness of it, like Mother’s, is odd; exotic, but not unattractive. It is no doubt insensitive and inefficient compared to a Vulcan ear, still...

"On duty you call me Miss or Lieutenant Valley — I'm your Assistant Science Officer. Off duty you call me Ruth or Dei'larr’ei."

Spock's eyebrows rose in astonishment. What reason would I have for being so familiar? he though with sudden apprehension. "Dei'larr’ei is a Vulcan word." he said instead, as if he were only curious. "I do not understand how it would apply to you."

"Are you familiar with any Terran literature?"

"I have read the standard classics."

"Then perhaps you know the story of a woman named Ruth."

"I believe it is from one of the sacred texts used by several major Terran religions."

"Right. You have applied a very famous quote from that story to me."

He considered. The obvious phraseology that was applicable to the Terran Hebrew story of Ruth was ‘whither thou goest, I will go.’ The Vulcan word ‘dei’larr’ei’ meant ‘where one travels, another follows.’ The connection made sense, but… "Why would I do that?" he wondered.

"Well… “ The young woman took a deep breath. “Because we're friends, for one thing. Very good friends. We've worked together for nearly four years and we share a great many interests. In fact, we spend a great deal of time together."

"Friendship,” he mused. “I have no reason to doubt you since you have more knowledge of my life than I have, but I cannot understand how such a relationship came about." He contemplated a thing that had disturbed him, then decided to ask for clarification. "Is friendship the reason you took the liberty of touching my shoulders and hand?"

"Yes. I was concerned for your health."

"I see. Do I generally allow this familiarity?"

"I have your permission for occasional physical contact since my species finds it important." Her tone was similar to the one his mother used when telling the truth while leaving out some significant fact.

"Since I have no memory of giving such permission, may I ask you to refrain from any further physical contact, Miss Valley."

"Very well, Mr. Spock. May I attempt another meld?"

"Allow me to meditate for a time before you make another attempt."

She did not look pleased but nodded. "Okay, have it your way, Bo— Mr. Spock. Jade's preparing a psycho-tricorded biography for you. We'll talk again after you've studied it. I'll report your condition to Captain Kirk, he'll be worried. Another friend," she explained quickly. She rose, and with a casual word in a language he did not know, exited as another Human female entered.

"I'm Nurse Chapel," the woman said. "Dr. Han asked me to set up the recording equipment."

Jilla Majiir was waiting outside Sickbay when Ruth stepped into the corridor. "How is he?" the Indiian asked anxiously.

Ruth was surprised. "You mean no one's told you?"

"No, not a word."

"When Jade says it's better to keep something secret she means it, but the ship's going to have to know if — "

"Ruth!"

"Sorry. He's fine. With one exception. How do I explain it?"

"Try putting one word after another in a logical order," Jilla suggested in worried annoyance.

"What did I do?"

Jilla glowed slightly, then calmed "I am sorry, Ruth, but I have been here since Jade summarily threw me out of Sickbay as if I had no right to ask about Spock’s condition."

"Why would — oh!"

"Oh?" Jilla demanded.

"He has partial amnesia," Ruth explained hastily. "He thinks he's sixteen. Jade thinks it'd be too traumatic for him to know about having a wife, or a pon – um – sex – um - cyclical link with someone else. We don't want a temporary condition to be shocked into a permanent one."

"Amnesia!" Jilla wailed and burst into tears. "And it is my fault! I should have compensated for the ion flux, but it happened so fast... what have I done!"

"But Jilla — " Ruth began, but decided that trying to reason with an upset Indiian was not a very good idea. As soon as Jilla calmed down she would realize herself that she was not to blame for what had happened and would be willing to aid Spock's recovery in any way she could. Ruth started to reach out to take Jilla into comforting arms, but as she did, Sulu came running up and Jilla fled to him.

"I could hear her as soon I got off the turbolift," he said. He held Jilla, murmuring comforting words, then looked Ruth. "She'll be okay, but I better take her home. Dr. McCoy says these mood swings she's been having are because of a chemical imbalance. It's an aftereffect of our assignment to the galactic core.”

"What mood swings? I mean besides today?" Ruth wondered. Except for the last few minutes, she hadn't noticed any difference in Jilla's behavior.

Sulu grinned. "I suppose it's just been in private. How's Spock?"

"Sixteen but otherwise healthy," Ruth replied. When he looked confused, she added, "Partial amnesia. If you see him, don't mention about me or Jilla."

Jilla moaned and suddenly began to glow brightly. "I better take her home,” Sulu said quickly. To Ruth's surprise, he picked Jilla up and strode toward the turbolift.

"She too feeble to walk?" Ruth wondered, half confused, half amused.

"Despite your assurance to the contrary, you are not being very cooperative,” Jade told her Vulcan patient.

"I fail to understand," Spock said. "I have studied all the data you have provided. You have asked nothing more of me."

"You could have allowed Ruth to heal you," she snapped in exasperation. Having gotten used to the grown-up version of him, she was that much more annoyed with the young super-Vulcan. Fond of him though she was, and had been at the time, she had never had much patience with it.

"If the young woman failed, no doubt it is her empathic talent which is at fault,” he replied so smugly that Jade had to fight the urge to knock the condescension right out of him.

"We both know better than that, Spock,” she told him.

"Indeed, Doctor. I did not know you were a telepath, " he stated.

He is not being supercilious, Jade told herself firmly. He is being as factual as his neurotic little mind can manage. At sixteen he was lucky to be functioning at all instead of sitting in a corner, logically catatonic. And I am not here to treat his adolescent feelings of inadequacy.

"Have I your permission to leave Sickbay?" he asked. "I have studied the ship’s layout and am confident that I can find my way about. "

Jade considered, then nodded and stepped to a com console. "Valley to Sickbay."

"Valley, acknowledged," Ruth answered almost immediately. When the Antari entered a moment later, Jade told her, "Spock would like a tour."

Spock's eyebrows shot up indignantly. “Doctor, that is not what I requested."

Jade ignored him. "I think he should be taken to his quarters as well."

Ruth's eyes widened in shock. She pulled Jade aside and whispered, "I haven’t had time to move my stuff out!"

"Why should you?" Jade asked blandly. “You live there."

"But I thought you..."

"I changed my mind. I don't think the shock will kill him. He's a big boy."

"Jade?"

"Don't whimper dear." She turned back to Spock. "You two run along. I'll look in on you later."

"But…”

"Go."

"Oy gevault.”

“Miss Valley," Spock interrupted. Ruth quickly turned her attention to him. He was already standing near the Sickbay door. "Since Dr. Han has apparently decided that I need a tour of this ship,” he said with a pointedly tolerant glance, “I suggest we proceed.”

Jade met his look with a decidedly forbearing one of her own.

“Where to first?” Ruth asked as she walked with Spock to the nearest turbolift. He seemed so formal it was all she could do not to add ‘loosen up, Boss.’

"My primary interest is in computers," he replied.

“With an A-7 rating it ought to be," she observed.

"Indeed," Spock said. "What is an A-7 rating?"

“Oy,” Ruth repeated.

“You have said that three times,” Spock pointed out. “What does it mean?”

Ruth blinked. This was going to be more difficult than she’d anticipated. “Uh – it’s an expression of – um – frustration, or annoyance, or surprise, or…” His eyebrows were lowered in disapproval and she shrugged. “Never mind.”

“Indeed.”

“Fascinating, hot damn,” she muttered.

“I beg your…?”

“Do you know how many times you’ve said that?”

“Do I know how many times I have said what, precisely?”

“Never mind.”

He stared at her with obvious disinterest. “I shall endeavor not to.”

For a moment, Ruth found herself marveling at this decidedly more Vulcan version of ‘I never do,’ then took a fortifying breath and instructed the lift to the Sciences Computer Lab.

"Most of this unit was designed by Daystrom,” Ruth explained as Spock carefully examined the main computer terminal. “Much of his work before multitronics was based on the theories of Senil."

"I study with Senil," Spock murmured.

“And I studied with Daystrom. Oh, and Spock," she added, smiling at him. She leaned over him, her fingers playing across the complex board. New data began filling screen and earpiece. Spock’s attention was fully riveted to the display of information.

"Fascinating," he whispered reverently.

Ruth sighed happily. "I know. I think we've been here a couple of hours." She again grinned at him. "This is almost as bad as when I first came on board. We disappeared into the computer and didn't come out for a full watch. Remember?"

"No."

She sighed again, this time in disappointment. "I didn't think so. Shall we continue the tour?"

Spock stood reluctantly. "Of course, Miss Valley. This has been most interesting." As they entered the turbolift he said, "I have noticed several crew members looking at me curiously."

"Yeah, I noticed that too. Don't pay attention, it was just Daffy and Ramon. Excuse me, I mean Lieutenants Gollub and Ordona."

"Is their behavior usually odd?"

"Just Daffy's. She's quite extraordinary. "

"In what way?"

Ruth considered. "Know what a practical joke is?"

"A Human concept," Spock said, even stiffer than usual.

"Yes, well, Daffy's very Human."

"Your explanations leave a great deal to be desired, Miss Valley. You should strive to be more precise."

"You sure you have amnesia?" Ruth wondered skeptically. "You don't sound any different than usual."

"It is my intention to be consistent," he replied.

Ruth scowled. "Right." She addressed the turbolift. "Bridge."

"Fascinating."

Spock had not been able to stop the exclamation upon first stepping onto the Bridge of the starship. To his mortification Miss Valley overheard his emotional outburst and turned a delighted smile on him.

"Sure is, isn't it, Boss?"

Spock took several deep, controlled breaths but chose to remain silent as the best defense against the young woman's enthusiasm. She seemed to expect some kind of emotional behavior. Spock did not understand and fought the distaste at the thought that perhaps his older self was weak enough to be less than Vulcan. He could not accept what seemed to be true -- that he might indulge in the mad behavior implied by — no! Calm. You have been injured and your thought processes have not yet had time to recover. Consider the positive aspects of this situation. If you have been guilty of such aberrant behavior, you are now being provided with the opportunity of correcting the situation.

He ignored the stares of the Humans surrounding him and told Valley, "Proceed."

She seemed about to make another emotional statement but instead took a deep breath, held it for three point two seconds before expelling it, then nodded and led him to the control console. Spock wondered at the illogical waste of time her reaction had caused. It did not seem to be an efficient way for a supposedly responsible officer to behave, but he chose not to enquire about it. He was certain that her attempted explanation would only waste more time.

"I'm going to kill him you know."

"Who?" Jade asked far too innocently.

Ruth took the conciliatory cup of coffee the doctor held out and perched herself on the edge of Bones' desk.

"You haven't said that in years," McCoy observed. "Always knew you couldn't put up with being married to a real Vulcan."

Ruth glared. "I am married to a Vulcan. He is a — rotten little kid,"

"Getting a taste of your own medicine?" McCoy cackled.

"Yes, and I don't like it a bit."

He leaned forward to give her a conciliatory pat on the thigh. "Poor Ruthie."

She turned to Jade. "Promise me he'll get better."

"Of course,” Jade returned. “Where is he now?"

"Bwana took over for me for awhile. I left them in Engineering." She gulped coffee then asked, "Other than compassion, why'd you call me down here?"

McCoy heaved a deep sigh. "We thought you should know about Mrs. Majiir."

"Yes," Jade agreed. "It could cause complications."

Ruth grew suddenly very worried. "Why? What's wrong with her? Anything I can — "

"No," Jade interrupted firmly. "Leonard, explain."

"Bones?"

"She's having some trouble with a slight chemical imbalance."

"Sulu mentioned that."

"Did he mention that she's having a mild bout of pon farr?"

Ruth wanted to laugh with relief. "Is that al---" The implications suddenly dawned on her. Jilla had been through pon farr once before. She and Spock had – mated — and in the course of things had formed a telepathic bond. They hadn't married because Jilla already was, and besides she loved Sulu. And Spock had been in love with Ruth. But the bond remained. "If she is then she's going to want but Sulu won't and Spock doesn't and he's.... sixteen."

"Precisely," Jade agreed.

"Oh — my — god."

"Have you told him you're married yet?" Jade asked.

"Uh -- no. I was waiting for an opportune — "

"Romantic."

" -- moment."

"I really think you'd better tell him," Jade advised.

Ruth looked from one doctor to the other. "He isn't going to like it, you know."

"We don't expect him to, dear."

"Maybe the shock'll kill him," McCoy suggested.

"Jade, you said — "

"I also said that I changed my mind."

"He'll whimper. I hate it when he whimpers."

"Consider the alternative of Jilla telling him that they're bonded."

Ruth stood abruptly, spilling the rest of her coffee down the front of her uniform. "Uh — yeah." She looked hopefully at the two doctors. "You are confining Jilla to her quarters aren't you? Her and Sulu I mean?"

Jade did something Ruth had not known was possible for her; she blushed. "Yes. Well, not precisely confined, they volunteered. But if the drive gets strong enough, Spock is going to notice and go looking for her."

"Or vice versa," McCoy added.

"Couldn't you stop it like the last time?" Ruth asked.

"Yes, but since it seems very mild at the moment, we think it would be better to let it run its course," Bones answered.

“And Spock's condition could clear up at any moment,” Jade pointed out.

Ruth sighed. "I certainly hope it’s soon.”

"First Officer's quarters are on deck five, next door to the Captain's,” Lieutenant Valley explained to Spock. They left the turbolift and walked down the corridor until they reached the appropriate door. He noted that there was a name plate reading 'Commander Spock’ in Anglo-Terran lettering on the bulkhead beside the entrance. That name plate made logical sense. The other one did not. Below his name was another that read 'Lieutenant Ruth Valley.’ That seemed most illogical.

"Miss Valley, might I enquire — "

The door opened as he spoke; she smiled and gestured for him to enter. "Well, come on."

"I am trying to ask you a question,” he pointed out firmly.

"Let's talk in private, okay?"

Spock was quite aware of the people passing them in the corridor, although he refused to acknowledge their existence. He saw that one young man, who he had been introduced to earlier in the day as Lieutenant Commander DelMonde, was scowling at Lieutenant Valley. He also noted it took some effort for Lieutenant Valley to ignore Mr. DelMonde. For some obscure reason Spock found that not having Miss Valley's complete attention disturbed him. No doubt because once it is lost, it is so difficult to get it back. He wondered if her behavior was peculiar to herself or could be generalized to describe Antaris in general.

"Spock?" she questioned and he realized that she had interpreted his silent speculations as an ignoring of her suggestion. He nodded politely to her reply, and stepped through the doorway. She followed him in, of course, but he almost forgot her presence in the calming influence of suddenly being surrounded by the familiar. The entire day had been spent in a Terran environment and he had been most uncomfortable. Here, the lighting, temperature and objects were Vulcan. No, that is not precisely accurate, he corrected himself as he went about inspecting the small rooms. There were many items in the room, including the shrine and the lyrette that could belong to no one but a Vulcan. However, he did not believe that even his mature self would have in his possession such things as an ancient Terran guitar or a book of Terran Japanese prints which he assumed were supposed to be erotic. He reserved judgment on the numerous flowering plants and the dylithium statue of mated le-matyas.

When he finished his short tour, he returned to stand in front of Miss Valley, who was semi-leaning on the desk. "I have noted, Miss Valley," he observed, "that you seem to perch on objects meant for purposes other than sitting. Is this an Antari custom?"

Once again she smiled at him. "Yeah," she answered. "I suppose it is."

"Most illogical."

She shrugged. "Yeah. Have a seat, Boss.”

"Pardon me?"

"Please be seated, Spock," she clarified.

He sat. "Explain."

"We're married."

He considered this statement, then answered, "That is not possible."

“My grandparents said the same when I told them I was marrying a Vulcan. They were wrong too. And since my choices were between you and an invisible ninja, they adjusted. I'm sure you will, too," she said encouragingly. He stared at her in dumbstruck silence until her features took on a worried look. “I’m not doing this very well, am I?"

"No," he agreed. “Whatever 'this' is, I do not believe you are doing it well.”

"I'm sorry. You see, and as you well know, whenever I'm nervous I get flippant. It usually doesn't help the situation.”

"Then you should not do it."

"I know." She sighed, then again tried to explain. “Eleven standard months and seventeen days ago, you and I signed a three year standard marriage contract. Remember?"

Spock concentrated on finding any memory of such an incident, but after some time was forced to answer, "Negative."

She smiled, but it was a nervous expression. "You will in a few days, I'm sure."

Spock supposed that she was trying to reassure him and was not certain he appreciated it. "Miss Valley," he explained in turn, "any form of marriage with you would be impossible."

She began to make an angry retort, then abruptly stopped, hesitated, then said instead, "Oh yeah, T'Pring." He nodded an uncomfortable agreement. “She broke your — engagement. I'll call up all the relevant data for you if you want,” she added helpfully.

Spock believed he did an adequate job hiding his shock. He said, “That would be useful, Miss Valley."

She turned to the computer annex, muttering as she did so, "At home you usually call me Ruth."

Spock did not reply to the statement which had not, after all, been directly spoken to him. Instead, he proceeded to read the information displayed on the computer screen. When he was finished, he asked, "Why was this information not included in the general biographical data I received earlier today?" he asked with some dismay.

"Jade didn't think you could take the shock."

"Indeed?” Spock suppressed both that predicted shock and his frown, as well as his consternation at the facts and that Jade had been accurate in her assessment of his reaction to them. He drew himself up carefully. “I do not understand Dr. Han's rationale,” he went on. “I am Vulcan. I am quite capable of accepting facts. While the idea that I have abandoned my duty to my father and to Vulcan by taking an off-world wife is an unpleasant one, I cannot alter what has already taken place. To attempt, now, to deny what is an inescapable reality would be illogical. Personal feelings are, at this point – indeed, at any point – irrelevant."

Miss Valley gave him a blank stare that was interspersed by several slow blinks. After more than a minute of this odd behavior she said, "What?"

"You wish me to repeat myself?"

She shook her head violently. When she stopped doing that, she said, "No, thank you."

Spock cocked his head to one side. "I perceive that you are offended. You no doubt expected some emotional outburst. No doubt Dr. Han did as well originally. However, for a Human she is most sensible; unlike most of that species, she is capable of recognizing and correcting a mistake. I believe I did overhear her instructing you albeit in a rather roundabout way, to inform me of our relationship.”

"Are all Vulcans so verbose?" the young woman asked mildly.

"When necessary."

"I see." She took several deep breaths with her huge eyes closed, then opened them and flashed another of her endless supply of smiles at him, this one indicating affection. "It's a good thing for both our mental health that I know you so well."

"Indeed, do you?"

"Uh-huh. You see, I'm very well aware that when you act like a prig you're under a great deal of emotional strain. That's okay, husband. I'm quite willing to ignore that unemotional outburst. I'll even leave you alone to meditate for awhile if you want."

Spock did not answer her verbally but nodded his willingness to be alone. Then he sat quietly in his chair until the door had closed behind her. Once alone he stood and began a restless pacing.

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